Genesis 2:4-9, Man, the Garden, and Two Trees

(Featuring images from The Brick Testament.)

Here is another story of how the heavens and earth were created. You liketh stories, don’t you? Surely. I kneweth you did.

The day that Yahweh^a made the earth and the heavens, when no plant of the field was yet in the earth and no herb of the field had sprouted - for Yahweh had not yet created immigrants to till the ground - a stream would rise from the earth, and water the whole face of the ground, keeping it moist not unlike how hippies keep a beached whale moist as it slowly dies.

Yahweh took 120 pounds of dust from the ground, which was a great feat unto itself as water covered the whole face of the earth, and he made a dust man. Then Yahweh breathed into the man’s nostrils, but the man's head burst and settled in a fine layer of silt over a cherub. Yahweh made the man a new dust head, and he tried again. Lo and behold, the man became a living being, and his name was Man.^b

And Yahweh planted a garden in Eden, which is a apparently a nice place, and he picked up Man like a little diorama figure and placed him in the garden, sort of leaning against a tree, for Man had only begun to walk. Like a newborn foal did Man's legs wobble.

Out of the ground Yahweh made to grow every tree that is pretty and good for food, the tree of life^c also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.^d

a.	Or Yesway, as in the apologist's strongest and only defense: “Yes way, he exists.”
b.	Hebrew Adam
c.	Eating from the tree of life is another way that man could have had eternal life after the fall (Gen 3:22). Perhaps Jesus should have suggested this to Daddy.
d.	Or entrapment

One tree gives you eternal life,
and the other has delicious apples.